The Sign of the Cross
April 15th, 2009 by nathaniel
This was a new, never even imagined experience for me: I was walking along the sidewalk, minding my business, when a 40ish woman sheltered, walking towards me under a red umbrella, made a sign of the cross, quite distinct and official, top of chest to stomach, then side to side. I didn’t catch her eye and couldn’t see what she had been looking at.
Nothing special was happening around us, no evident crimes occurring, no black cats in sight — I was going through this reasoning as she walked on by me and continued on her way — so I had to presume that the object of her exorcism was myself.
She could have been coming from the April 15 anti-tax rally at the Court House corner. Did she know that I was walking back from the post office, having put 5 tax-related envelopes in the mail? If she had divine enlightenment, though, she would have known that today I actually paid a total of only $11 — an average of only $2 per envelope, hardly a cause for such radical countermeasures, I would think, though it’s true I already overpaid by mistake and deserve a refund, so in that sense I’ve been complicit (every year,actually) in the government overspending that dates back to the 1980’s.
The anti-tax rally included the usual elements; among the “Taxation = Robbery” and “No Spending Surge signs, I noted “Support the Troops” and “Commander-in-Thief” signs. Let’s see: “Support the Troops” would be pro-Obama, I guess, since he is now in charge of those (quite costly, if we reflect on it) troops; but “Commander-in-Thief” must be anti-Obama, even though Congress controls the budget. I looked myself over for telltale signs of guilt. Ah, there it must be: a somewhat fading, 2-inch round Obama sticker that has adhered to my jacket since early fall 2008.
Obama, Obama… now here’s another possibility: my exorcizer was also coming from the direction of St. Agnes Church: could it be that my little old Obama sticker — really quite worn now after more than 6 months — had somehow offended against her faith, prompting her to make the sign for “Satan, get thee behind me”? I reflected on a person of my acquaintance who, when (non-Catholic) missionaries at the door asked whom she worshiped, replied “Seitan” (which she was cooking at the time; in case you aren’t familiar with it, it’s a fermented form of tofu). That proved an effective way to end that conversation!
Now surely my offense wasn’t as damnable as supporting John Kerry, who as a Catholic was (and may still be, for all I know) on the receiving end of a move to deny him communion. But here’s the point: Obama, I remembered as I turned the corner back toward the anti-tax rally, is now under, as it were, fire for being pro-choice, and forces are working to deny the president his scheduled graduation speech at Notre Dame or at least, in a Solomonic proposal I read in the Inquirer the other day, to tell him that in the name of free speech he is welcome to come and talk to the graduates but isn’t worthy of receiving an honorary degree.
Could my hypothesis be right? Is this how our society dialogues these days: the sign of Obama on one side, the sign of the cross on the other? Really, I’d much rather be picked on, this April 15, for having a big “I Love Taxes” (which of course I don’t) sign stamped on my forehead.
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